Baby snarling beast

Don't drive angry.Never discipline a child when you're angry. Don't grocery shop when you're hungry. Don't call me when you're drunk. Never re-gift to the original giver of said "gift". These are some cardinal rules. Rules are made for the protection of life/sanity/decency/respect. I'm going to add one more "Cardinal Rule". Don't blog when you're tired. It's not good. No-one wants to see your rant. Unless people have been keeping up with your day to day stuff, you will just come across sounding like a crazy person... I tell myself this, I try to take my own sage advice... Alas, here I am, sucking down my scalding caffeinated tea, as though to drown the words that are choking me. Do you know how many of my close friends and relatives have really no idea what it means to Foster? It would shock you. Not because I'm particularly verbose, or outgoing. But I think a sheer disbelief that the system is as messed up as it is. I digress. You know those sweet little humming noises coming from the bassinet beside the bed. The full body stretch and yawn? You know in your mind that, that sweet little baby that is making rrryum-rrryum noises in the bed next to you is going to awaken, with little (or not so little) howls for food, comfort, and just in general to make sure that you are there to serve at they're beck and call. The tender mother rolls over, trying to stay as asleep as possible...sometimes resorting to opening only one eye, scoops up the babe, scoots back in the bed to a half sitting position and feeds and soothes, coos, and loves until the little tot drifts back into a warm milk induced coma. :-) Several months of this go by. The mother posts something funny on Facebook. Quips about how sweet the baby is in the middle of the night, but that sleep MUST come soon, or everyone in the house will feel the wrath... There are a plethora of comments, "they'll start sleeping soon", "this too shall pass" or my favorite, "I was up too! Lets be middle of the night friends!", I've actually said that one. ;-) Now we fast forward, it's been months of this, and little angel babe during the day, turns into a yowling-snarl-beast past midnight. The mother is looking haggard, and used. She barely attempts to leave her pajamas or wear Chapstick. The loving, always supportive father asks the children quietly as he returns from a 24hr shift, "How's mom? Is it safe to enter?" The adoring wife hurls something small and easily accessible in his direction. ;-) j/k You get the idea though. 10 months of this, and the typical parent is starting to see a light at the end of the tunnel... Babies will learn to sleep eventually. I mean, somewhere between infancy and teenage years they decide that sleep is the only thing they want! (Ask my teenager!) But here is where the foster parent and the biological parents split. Everytime little K is up in the night, I think to myself. "Self, she could be leaving you at any time. *tears... Enjoy these middle of the night times, lock them away in the vault of your mind. Make them easily retrievable. Record every little line of her face, curve of her cheek, smell of her hair." I know, I know, it's the job. I signed up for this. I knew what I was getting myself into. For heavens sake, I took a years worth of classes! Being a foster parent is tough... But I wouldn't trade a single moment, even the up in the middle of the night ones. This little Snarl-Beast is as precious to me as any child I birthed, and I know her Heavenly Father cares for her even more than that.